Meanest Story nominee: Suri's twisted world.

Publication: Weekly Life & Style
Date: 4 April 2011

The typical Suri Cruise story in the supermarket rags tells us she is a handful, but this one lays some of the blame on the adults in her life. Here are the sub-headlines.

• plays with x-rated candy
  
• dragged out of bed by Katie for 1 a.m. dinner
  
• still using a pacifier at age 4
  
• What Katie's parents are doing to save Suri
  

You will note that the sperm donor is left completely out of the equation.

This gets a nomination for Meanest Story of the Week.