Non scoop of the week! O.J. Simpson confesses the murders to Oprah!

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 4 July 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! The Enquirer says a "pal" of O.J.'s has reported that O.J. confessed to the murders from seventeen years ago when he talked recently to Oprah Winfrey.

It's complete horseshit. Oprah denies it up and down.

When you think that those murders happened seventeen years ago, do you feel a little old? Yeah, me too.

Damn You Fat Alert™: O.J. Simpson heart attack shocker

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 4 April 2011

According to The Flagship, O.J. Simpson is depressed in prison and packing on the pounds, up from 225 pounds when he went in to 275 pounds now. As often happens, the Enquirer will embellish a story like this with a phrase like "heart attack" or "dying". There is no evidence that the assumed double murderer and convicted thief has suffered a heart attack as of this writing.