Non scoop of the week! O.J. Simpson confesses the murders to Oprah!

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 4 July 2011

Fresh trash on Thursdays! The Enquirer says a "pal" of O.J.'s has reported that O.J. confessed to the murders from seventeen years ago when he talked recently to Oprah Winfrey.

It's complete horseshit. Oprah denies it up and down.

When you think that those murders happened seventeen years ago, do you feel a little old? Yeah, me too.

Missed deadline alert: Miss Aretha Franklin is still alive.

Six months ago, the National Enquirer started one of their scummy vendettas against Miss Aretha Franklin, quoting a "family insider" that she had pancreatic cancer, a report she steadfastly denies. They said she had six months to live. It's six months later, and the Queen of Soul is still alive and considerably thinner, which is a good thing.

Best wishes to the Queen of Soul, Miss Aretha Franklin, her family and friends, from a devoted fan.

Dancing With The Stars rigged!

Publication: National Enquirer

Date: 6 June 2011

The Enquirer goes with a cover story saying Dancing With The Stars is rigged this season, and they put pictures of the finalists Kirstie Alley, Hines Ward and Chelsea Kane on the cover.

Here's the thing. They said the same thing two months ago and predicted the eventual winner would be Kirstie Alley or Kendra Wilkinson, two names well known to the readers of gossip rags.

Hines Ward won. He's not well known to the gossip world, but he's an athlete. Athletes do really well on this show.

This is exactly the type of story I had in mind when I started this blog, a time when the Enquirer expects that everyone has the attention span of a gnat and it will be ignored that their bold prediction of just two months ago was complete horseshit.

Guess what, Enquirer? I don't have the attention span of a gnat. I publish on the Internet, where nothing ever completely disappears down the memory hole.

The Enquirer prints lies, guesses and nonsense with astonishing regularity. This blog is here to catch the worst cases.

You're welcome. I'm glad to do it.

Missed deadline alert: Steve Jobs is still alive.

Six weeks ago, the National Enquirer wrote that Steve Jobs of Apple had six weeks to live. Here it is, six weeks and one day later and Mr. Jobs is still alive. Steve joins Dick Clark, Michael Douglas and Bill Clinton as the folks still alive after a prediction of death in a given time. Last year, Elizabeth Edwards also missed a deadline but died about two months after the predicted time. The only correct deadline prediction so far in 2010 and 2011 is Miss Elizabeth Taylor, when the Globe said her birthday in February 2011 would be her last.

Recall that the Enquirer was given a lot of credit a few years back when they predicted Michael Jackson had six months to live and he died before that deadline was up. Like most folks with "correct" predictions of this nature, there is a lot of guesswork going on and they expect we won't recall the mistakes.

This blog exists to make sure the mistakes get a full airing.

Best wishes to Steve Jobs, his family and friends, from a blogger writing on a Mac.