And the camera noses in to the tears on her face: Teresa's prison nightmare.

Publication: In Touch
Date: 27 June 2011

The husband of Teresa Giudice, the gossip rags' favorite Real Housewife of New Jersey, is going to jail. Teresa is not happy about this. Here are the headlines.

• In a shocking exclusive interview, she opens up about:
• Her husband being locked up for 10 years
• Raising her kids alone
• "I'm terrified"

Back in late May, Teresa had a headline that read "Fame destroyed my family!"

Yep, fame and illegal activities are a bad cocktail.

Teresa's shocking split: 'Fame destroyed my family!'

Publication: In Touch
Date: 6 June 2011

Every version of Real Housewives produces a breakout star, which invariably means there is one psycho bitch that that makes all the other psycho bitches look sane and reasonable. In Real Housewives of New Jersey this season, it's Teresa Giudice. Here are the headlines.

• Housewives exclusive interview
• Husband Joe Fumes, "I'm leaving"
• Fights over money, booze & jealousy
• "I'm embarrassed for my kids," she confesses

Embarrassment for her kids? OMG, what kind of weak psycho bitch is she? These women are supposed to be at least as bad as Sarah Palin, but this woman seems to have both some self-awareness and compassion towards others.

Some producer at Real Housewives slipping if this is the worst villain they could find.

Damn You Fat Alert™: Jessica Simpson drunk and crying over her weight.

Publication: Star magazine
Date: 30 May 2011

Two very different stories about Jessica Simpson in the tabs this week. Star says she's upset over her weight, and gets drunk and weepy about it.

And the camera noses in to the tears on her face: The disappearance of Holly Bobo.

Publication: Globe
Date: 9 May 2011

Holly Bobo, a nursing student from Tennessee, has been missing since April 13. The Globe acts like they've broken the case wide open. Here are the sub-headlines.

• Who took her and why
• all the chilling details

In fact, the police are still looking for her and/or her abductor.

Best wishes to Holly, her family and friends.

And the camera noses in to the tears on her face: Wynonna Judd's daughter disappears!

Publication: Star
Date: 9 May 2011

The Star lets us know that Wynonna Judd's daughter disappeared and the FBI solved the case. They do not say whether it was a kidnapping or a runaway situation. You'll have to open the magazine to find that out, which is something I almost never do. I could have looked online to find out more, but I wasn't that interested.

Sue me.

Meanest Story nominee: Ashley Judd: "I was raped."

Publication: National Enquirer
Date: 11 April 2011

Welcome to gossip hell, Ashley Judd! The actress has a memoir coming out where she tells the story of a man who attacked her when she was a teenager and how she fought back. The Enquirer includes the fact that she fought back in the sub-headline and from other reports it sounds like an attempted rape, but that has never stopped the Enquirer from making a story as salacious as possible on the cover.

In any case, this blog sends Ms. Judd its best wishes. This story gets a nomination for Meanest Story of the Week.